Auld Lang Syne (New Year Song)

Happy New Year! I am extremely excited for the start of 2022. While 2021 was not a terrible year for me, it also was not the best. I did not feel motivated to do much. If being in a rut was a person you would have seen me. This New Year, like many others, is a new start. For me, it is particularly exciting/terrifying. I am finally able to look for jobs outside of Oregon. This is something I have been wanting to do for a while, and now, here it is… my opportunity to truly embody new year new me.

While I am excited about starting new – new job, new state, new city (or old ones if I end up back in a state/city I was previously in) – I know the change will be hard for my daughter. She has an amazing group of friends who are very supportive and I know she does not want to leave. I hate that she will have to leave them but staying is not an option. I have tried for years to take my next career step and it has not happened for whatever reason. I know first hand how hard it is to leave the home you have always known. I did it when I moved from Puerto Rico to Michigan in 8th grade, and I had to learn a new langue to boot. It all worked in the end, as it will for my daughter, but it does not feel that way to her right now and I am trying to be understanding, loving, and patient. I am praying that everything works out this year. That the timing of finding a job will make it so that we can move during the summer, this way my cutie will finish 8th grade in Oregon and we will be in our new place before starting high school. In my heart, I truly believe everything will happen to our benefit, but I am still praying and setting intentions just to be safe. 

My lack of motivation for the past couple of years (if I am honest, the lack of motivation started before 2021) has me feeling unlike myself. It has been hard to get back to me, who I was before this version of myself took over. This new year feels like a step towards getting back to my true self, the decisive, driven, motivated woman I used to be. I really liked her. The thought of moving, packing, finding a new place to live, starting a new job feels overwhelming at times, but it also feels really good. I am choosing to see this transition as a gift to myself. I am giving myself the gift of… me. Getting back to the woman I love. I have missed her more than I realized. I can’t wait to be her again, queue in Reunited by Peaches & Herb. Happy New Year to me! 

With this new year I am also getting back to my quest of Living An Unapologetic Life. I am kicking off 31 days of unapologetic living. Today, I stayed in my room, in my nightgown, most of the day. I slept in, watched tv, clean out my dresser drawers, and in general, took my time. It was after 5pm when I finally went downstairs so that I could take myself out to dinner. There was work that I could have done but I chose my chill mode over everything else and I loved every minute. So this January, I will do something everyday, big or small, that is unapologetically for me.