Building Community & Giving Back

Being a part of a community is very important to me, which is something I shared with my sorority sisters and close friends in Michigan and Texas. However, I have found it hard to build a community in Oregon. I have felt lonely at times, not because I do not have a relationship, but because I do not have a tribe, a community that I belong to and that feeds my soul.

I have always liked giving back. Ok, not always… but my father was determined to show my brothers and me to do and be better when we were selfish, self-absorbed teenagers. I have not been as engaged as I wanted to since being in Oregon. I need to find more opportunities to get more involved after COVID because I want my daughter to continue to know the importance of giving back and doing her part. I have been working on her since she was little, but we can both do more.

When Amarilis was two we collected clothes and toys she was no longer using and took them to Goodwill. I made her put her bag in the bin all by herself. She was the cutest donation person that day, I guarantee it. 🙂 We did it before Christmas so that she could give to others before she received gifts herself.

As my cutie got older, she began to care more about helping people, especially the homeless. A few years back we put bags together with food, socks, toiletries, and a five-dollar bill. We hand-delivered the bags to homeless men and women in downtown Portland.

We also helped with donations to Puerto Rico after hurricane Maria. At first, I donated items but I wanted to do more. A group of people organized the collection and boxing of donations and I volunteered to drive some packages to the airport and I took my daughter along. 

We also went to the Women’s March in 2017. I knew it was important for my love to begin to understand that we have to stand in solidarity with our sisters. I wanted her to see how powerful it is when women come together because we are a force to be reckoned with.

After COVID started in 2020, I took my daughter with me to do food deliveries for people in need. An organization in the area worked with volunteers to assemble food boxes and drivers to make deliveries. I did the first delivery by myself but the second I took Amarilis with me. To me, it was important for my daughter to be a part of this effort and she got into the swing of things right away.

Some of the most challenging conversations I have had with my daughter have been around race and how Black people are treated in this country. These last few years have been even harder with the frequent killings of Black men and women. This past year, she had an opportunity to create a poster for her art class and she decided to do it on BLM. It took her three days to write all of the names on her poster. I was very proud that seized an opportunity with this class project to #saytheirnames. 

My biggest honor is to teach my daughter to be a woman who is not only confident in herself but who is also civic-minded. I take this very seriously, as my parents did with me. I hope she remembers these times fondly and that she continues to give back as an adult and with her own children; if she chooses to have them. I hope that as she grows up, she surrounds herself with women who are caring and who also give back. It is so important to have friends who are like-minded and supportive. I have that with my sisters and friends and I pray she will as well.